Sat Dec 7, 2013 – having a rough day
Well it hasn’t been easy I tell you. I wrote this the other night when life felt as grim as it could be, awake all night praying and singing to myself, rocking myself back and forth in pain, and then the first birds started still in the pitch black dark, so I wrote this poem: “The Bird’s Song” to have a record of how bad it’s been so that when the sun shines again, I can remember the bad times – to enjoy the good times. Hope you read and share!
The Bird’s Song by Colleen Kelly
In the cool dark quiet of the night
Still so many hours until daylight
The pain and fear starts to set in
It’s so long since I’ve seen me grin
The pain of the body, the pain of the mind
The pain of the soul, the pain of the grind
All hope seems lost when your mind goes inside
All joy has gone, and you’ve lost all your pride
The horror of loss.
The change of my soul
Crumpled deep in my pain
In sadness I fold
What was that, was it something, or naught?
Was that a real sound, or was that just my thought?
Was that the sound of the first morning bird…
whispering their song, almost afraid to be heard?
But then it builds, louder and stronger
The sound fills the air, and last so much longer
Still in the dark, the birds always know
Well before the sun makes it’s glorious show
And hope comes back to me lying in pain
The fear seems to wane and peace above strain
How does a bird know better than us
What is the time – the birds come and tell us!
We lie there needing a watch or a clock
To tell us the time, and even then we are lost
What time could it be, before the first rays of light
And, once again, we’ve made it through the night
“To hell and back” is what one person said
With a clipboard standing at the end of my bed
And I have to agree when I have this much pain
That my life, and my body, will never be the same
Today’s morning song of the earliest bird
Is the one thing I definitely know that I heard
The thing that reminds me to keep up the hope
And I cling to the sound like I’m holding a rope
It’s then the sun starts to grow and be strong
Just as the bird had foretold in their song
And that’s when I feel it – a change coming through
That’s when you know that the change is in you
One little step. One little breath
One tiny movement that keeps me from death
One step forward – just as I should
And Just as the bird told me I would.
By Colleen Kelly